September 29, 2009 Leave a comment
+++ PRESS RELEASE +++
+++ Tuesday 29th Sept 2009 +++
sNurfCOM1, the Kingdom’s favourite state broadcaster has announced that starting this Saturday evening, and running for the next 147 Saturday evenings, will be the biggest entertainment audience participation educational investment portfolio renovation family programme ever devised. Yes, that’s right, The SNURF Factor launches this weekend and is expected to get an audience of 100%, as THE THING IN CHARGE has decreed it is a hanging offence to not watch the show!
The SNURF Factor is presented by national broadcasting treasure Leonard Nimjohn, and features four startlingly chosen guest judges. Head of the judges is THE THING IN CHARGE, who will attend each programme via audio-telecoms from his fortress in the sky. Joining THE THING IN CHARGE are singing pop diver DANNY MINNOW, pop princess with the unfortunate heritage CHESNEY KOLE, and a small mad sounding round furry thing that constantly shouts “BUT BUT BUT BUT BUT BUT”.
Inhabitants of the KINGDOM OF SNURF have been queuing for months now for their chance to take part in the show…no-one has been told yet what that role may be, but it is thought that the recent culling of all experienced television personnel has left a number of jobs open on the production side of things. But what of the rest? Just what will the judges be judging? Articulated lorries from around the world have been converging on the mammoth TV studios in the capital city SNURFDON, bringing a plethora of goods from every conceivable country, and several inconceivable ones!
THE THING IN CHARGE orders you to watch the show to find out more. You will need a telephone to vote, a pen and some paper, a twenty sided dice and some shearing tongs. You will find in this week’s sNurfCOM Times a weatherproof mack, three herring, some dimples and something special for the kids. Ensure you have all these items displayed in your window 2 hours before the programme starts. Inspection teams will be scouring the Kingdom.
So come one, come all (or else) to the biggest TV event ever staged. THE THING IN CHARGE requires you to join in and have a fun evening, every Saturday for the next 147 weeks.
And who knows – it COULD be you!
N.B. If it IS you, the employees and management of sNurfCOM1 offer you their condolences and ask that you wait patiently. Due to the extreme numbers involved our professional and courteous staff will get to you as quickly as possible. Please provide your own kneepads and arrange for a family member or friend to collect the bucket afterwards.